The Cost of Family Breakdown: A National Disgrace 

Pouring millions into funding divorce is yet another form of national suicide!

Last week the Government announced additional plans to help people experiencing problems within marriage. That sounds great news  – especially for the nation’s children who are the ones who suffer most from marriage breakdown.

So, what is this good news? Are they going to set out marriage advisory counselling or some similar service to help couples stay together?

Family Mediation Voucher Scheme

No - the Government’s proposal is exactly the opposite. They are extending an existing scheme whereby financial support is offered to those who want to separate or divorce! This sounds unbelievable - but that is the fact of the latest madcap proposal coming out of Westminster.

Under the Family Mediation Voucher Scheme, the Government offers a £500 voucher to help separating couples with children to agree on childcare and financial arrangements without going to court - with no means test or questions asked. For those who do seek legal aid to pay their expenses for separation or divorce, additional (significant) financial support is available. The government has also expanded its online support for separating families through a range of digital tools available on GOV.UK.

According to the latest figures released by the Ministry of Justice, more than 60,000 couples have applied to the Family Mediation Voucher Scheme since its launch in 2021, resulting in 57,335 vouchers being granted with a combined value of almost £30 million. Many more will be eligible to apply as a result of the scheme’s recent extension.

The Exeter Family Study

A quarter of a century ago, back in the year 2000, I was responsible for a report presented to Parliament showing that the cost to the nation of family breakdown was £15 billion a year. That research has recently been updated which shows that the cost today to the nation of family breakdown is in excess of £51 billion per year. The drain on the nation’s resources by this kind of expenditure is colossal.

But far more significantly, family breakdown impacts hugely upon children.

This financial madness, of course, adds significantly to the vast expenditure on Welfare already caused by family breakdown - resulting in huge numbers of adults experiencing stress, anxiety, depression and mental health problems which impact upon our National Health Services. But far more significantly, family breakdown impacts hugely upon children.

I well remember the landmark Exeter Family Study (conducted by Monica Cockett and John Tripp - 1994) which showed conclusively that children who experience repeated family re-organisation (multiple partner changes or living with one parent then the other) struggle significantly more in developmental areas than those from stable "intact" families. While living in an intact family with severe parental conflict is damaging to a child, the study found that divorce and subsequent family restructuring does not automatically resolve these problems and can sometimes exacerbate a child's difficulties.

The study found, further, that children in re-ordered families—such as those who forge bonds with step-parents only to face a subsequent breakdown—fared worse emotionally and behaviourally than those from consistently low-conflict intact homes.

The Family Mediation Voucher Scheme is likely to add further to the negative effects facing the lives of countless children. At the moment, the Government spends nothing at all upon strengthening marriage relationships, although the Married Couples Allowance gives about £250 a year in tax relief.

Progressive madness

Back in 1972, I was lecturing in Sociology at The London School of Economics, when a gay rights group (though the term ‘gay’ was new in those days) issued a memorandum in which they stated that the traditional nuclear family of mum, dad and children was the source of their repression. They made clear that their prime objective was to undermine and abolish traditional family life. I almost laughed when I read it, as the proposal seemed ridiculous. But the way the LGBTQ+ rights campaign – now a powerful global movement that few people dare oppose - has infiltrated Whitehall and succeeded in influencing legislation has been nothing short of phenomenal.

The way the LGBTQ+ rights campaign – now a powerful global movement that few people dare oppose - has infiltered Whitehall and succeeded in influencing legislation has been nothing short of phenomenal.

The forces of darkness have not only been active in government, but very much in the media – especially the BBC. Just last week, Fran Unsworth, the BBC’s former Director of News and Current Affairs (2018-22), said that the corporation succumbed to “progressive madness” in its coverage of transgender issues during her tenure, driving her out of the corporation - with “a kind of national bullying going on in every institution in society”.

Family Matters

The Lords and Commons Family and Child Protection Group, for whom I was the Research Director for a number of years, and of which I am still a member to this day, presented a report to Parliament as long ago as 1998 when Jack Straw was the Home Secretary. The report: ‘Family Matters’ was a national survey of the health of the family in Britain. The research showed that children from divorced families suffer multiple disadvantages – and not least boys, who suffer from fatherlessness - in comparison with children from intact families. The report issued strong warnings of what would happen in the future if there was no change of direction to strengthen marriage and family life.

The more comprehensive national report on ‘The Cost Of Family Breakdown’ was published just two years later, in 2000. It said that there were schools in Britain where the majority of children came from homes where a secure family structure had broken down, thus adversely affecting their behaviour. The report stated; “From an early age, children give out tell-tale signs about how their home background is affecting their behaviour in school.”  It also noted the stress that this placed upon teachers.

Ongoing harm

Today, family breakdown is a principal direct cause of the huge amount of mental health problems among adults, as well as the insecurity and suffering experienced by children. Yet in face of all this mountain of sociological research, the Government continues to further family breakdown by a free gift of £500 to couples who are having difficulty staying together, regardless of the pain and suffering that will be inflicted upon children. 

Today, family breakdown is a principal direct cause of the huge amount of mental health problems among adults, as well as the insecurity and suffering experienced by children.

What kind of nation do we live in?

We clearly have a Government that is hell-bent upon following a policy of national disgrace that can only result in bringing the wrath of God in judgement upon the nation in accordance with the severe warnings that Jesus gave about harming children.

A Prayer

Lord, please will You protect and bless the thousands of children whose young lives are affected by family breakdown. Shield their tender hearts from fear, confusion and guilt. Remind them continually that they are deeply loved by You.

Grant wisdom and patience to parents, that they might seriously consider the enormous consequences of divorce and separation. May they have the very best interests of their children in mind, and may they constantly speak life, reassurance, and love over them.

Lord, give those who are charged with governing our nation the sense and guidance to lead in ways that accord with divine principles – that they might help enhance and strengthen the family structure, rather than assist in tearing it apart.

Lord, have mercy on our nation. “In wrath remember mercy” (Habakkuk 3:2)

Amen.

(Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay)